Products by

Susan Fee

In This Issue

News & Notes:  Speaking of Hope

Manager's Tip Sheet: Managing Stress During Turbulent Times

Personal Tip Sheet:  Challenge Negative Talk

Difficult Conversations:  Remaining Politically Correct    

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News & Notes:Speaking of Hope

It’s hard to escape media reports forecasting doom and gloom, but I’m trying.  It’s not that I don’t recognize the gravity of the economy, but I’d rather focus on things within my control. 

I’m certainly not in the financial business, but I am in the business of inspiring people to have hope during challenging times.  A few years ago, I wrote a tips booklet called Building Resiliency:  68 Coping Strategies to Survive & Thrive During Adversity.  At the time, my husband had lost his job and I was watching Hurricane Katrina leave thousands of people homeless and hopeless.  I began researching optimism and resiliency.  What makes certain people better able to cope?

I was encouraged to learn that it had nothing to do with circumstances.  In fact, optimistic people have experienced just as many struggles, if not more, than the average person.  They are not “lucky.”  But, they had acquired certain skills that allowed them to adapt – skills all of us can learn. 

Start by monitoring your thoughts and what you choose to discuss.  Stay focused on solutions rather than repeating bad news or complaining.  If the government’s bailout package frustrates you, I want to offer a different perspective.  Check out my blog for some good news and feel free to talk all about it!

Until next month,

Susan Fee

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Manager's Tip Sheet:  Managing Stress During Turbulent Times

 

A newly released survey by the American Psychological Association shows the declining economy is causing stress levels to skyrocket.  High stress levels can negatively impact worker productivity, personal and professional relationships, and physical health. 

As a manager, you can act as a resource for suffering employees by acknowledging their stress and offering practical steps to reduce it. Here are five tips that you can share:

Focus on what you can control.  Obsessing about people or circumstances that you cannot control leads to increased stress and anxiety.  Write down everything that worries you.  Cross off anything you cannot control and circle what you can.  Focus only on the things you circled.

Ask a different question.  Focusing on why your circumstances occurred will keep you stuck and feeling powerless.  Instead, ask what can I do right now that will improve my situation?  Or, how can I behave differently so that I can take care of myself?

Turn off technology.  Information overload keeps you from truly decompressing and repeatedly exposing yourself to news stories about the economy can leave you feeling helpless.  Instead, treat yourself to silence, reading a favorite book, or exercise. 

Write in a journal.  Putting your feelings down on paper provides distance and a new perspective.  Write the truth without worrying how other people might react.  You can also use your journal to visualize your ideal future six months from now.  What would you need to do right now to make that happen?

Engage in hobbies.  Remind yourself of activities that bring you joy, comfort, and satisfaction.  During stressful times, these are usually the first things we eliminate from our lives.  Making time for hobbies will help you feel more balanced. 

In addition, consider offering employees workshops on exercise, healthy eating, stress management, and resiliency techniques.  Check your insurance or employee assistance program for qualified speakers.

Susan’s workshops and seminars.

 

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Personal Tip Sheet: Challenge Negative Talk

 

There’s a lot to complain about these days, for sure.  But, then again, can’t you always find bad things to talk about?  Negative talk is draining and unproductive.  Speaking in positive terms doesn’t mean you are ignoring problems, just describing those challenges in terms of solutions. 

If you’re not sure if you’re a negative-talker, just check out the types of people you attract. Complainers associate with complainers.  If you spend your days complaining about the people in your life and how they need to change – well, here’s your chance to do something about it!  Start by changing yourself.  Here are three ways to shift to more positive conversations:

Share what’s going right.  Some people are in the habit of connecting through sharing bad news and gossip.  You may not realize that if you’re not complaining, you don’t have much else to say!  Challenge yourself to start sharing what’s going right and acknowledging the good news of others.

Say what you can do.  Talk about what you can do versus what you can’t.  Focusing on limitations leads to dead ends.  Whatever you focus on expands, so talk about possibilities.

Limit venting.  Everyone has a bad day now and then, but repeating it non-stop doesn’t make you feel any better.  If you need to vent some negative feelings, do so for about two minutes, then start focusing on solutions.  If you attract people who like to vent, let them know upfront that you will listen for only a few minutes before asking them about solutions.

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 Difficult Conversations: Remaining Politically Correct

Q:  I have a colleague who always wants to debate politics with me.  I consider my views private and don’t want to get into with him.  But, changing the subject doesn’t seem to work.  What else can I say?

A:  You have every right to keep your views private, but be prepared to state so firmly.  Someone who loves to debate and passionately expresses a position will need more than a change of subject to stop.  Staying silent can also suggest that you are in agreement with his views which only encourages him to talk more. 

You might state your boundaries this way, “I respect that you feel strongly about your views.  I feel strongly that at work I want to keep our discussions focused on business only, not politics.  If you bring it up again, please know that I will attempt to refocus the topic on business or choose to leave the conversation.”    

 

Submit your difficult questions to Susan_Fee@msn.com.  If your question is chosen for publication, you’ll receive a complimentary copy of Dealing With Difficult People.

   

   

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Interested in booking training or coaching?  Let me know how I can help, Susan_Fee@msn.com. 

 

Susan Fee is a licensed counselor, personal coach, and national speaker.  She is the author of Positive First Impressions, Dealing with Difficult People, Building Resiliency, Secrets of Successful Presentations, and the college survival guide, My Roommate Is Driving Me Crazy!  She can be reached through her Web site at www.susanfee.com or by email at Susan_Fee@msn.com. 

 

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, 2008